DeMarcus Cousins Wants To Snap Your Neck. And Yours Too.

First off, a big welcome to Jake who’ll be taking on a large role here at A Royal Pain. I was out of town this weekend (you know, fighting ninja’s and shit) so I didn’t get a chance to properly welcome the upcoming Kings blogging star, but, alas…I’m doing so now after my weekend of espionage.

As for the Kings…

By now I’m sure you’ve heard that the OTHER Maloof brother, George (the one you always see surrounded by large busted blondes in Vegas or on E! television) was nabbed by Vegas police on Saturday night for driving under the influence.Yup, that’s right. A person with more money than Jesus (who I shall now refer to as Buster Facking Posey), part owner in a world famous hotel that has about 39284903284239084 limos of their own, and in a city with enough cabs to make New York jealous, can’t prevent themselves from getting behind the wheel?

Amazing.

I guess Noch wasn’t available to designated drive. Tyreke was, but, he was on his way to sign autographs for children at a park and sing Christmas carols. Yo ho ho, it’s a pirate life for me. Wait, shit, wrong song. Um, uh, I like big butts and I can not…ah screw it.

In more less criminalistic news, DeMarcus Cousins is going for the jugular on any team that doubted him. And with that said, I’m sure some famed sports reporter will now categorize the apparently “volatile” *rolls eyes* Cousins into a serial killer.

Marc J. Spears of Yahoo has a wonderful piece of DCuz and the potential expectations and demands of a top five pick, which you can check out here.

In game related news, the Kings dropped their second in a row, now falling to 1-2 in the 2010-2011 preseason. Cousins and Thompson (despite his poor shooting night) have been playing like man-beasts so far, despite the Kings record. I’ve never been one to really take much away from the preseason so I suggest you keep your huggies tight and don’t let them bunch up too bad.

Tags: DeMarcus Cousins Maloofs

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